“So, to add to your stress level…” Teacher said Tuesday night as he started making dinner, “Lynn asked us for a big favor today. She said she’d owe you mucho margaritas if we could do it.” Lynn, aka Seidel Sensei, is the Japanese teacher at Teacher’s school. Each of the elementary schools in the district teaches either German, Spanish or Japanese to all the students beginning in Pre-Kindergarten. “There’s a group of Thai students and teachers coming to Wisconsin for two weeks and since the district has done this kind of thing before we were asked to host them, but one of the host families fell through.” Teacher continued. “Lynn asked if we could fill in and host one of them – she said she’d owe us big time. I’d really like to do it.” I looked at him in shock; I don’t know what kind of favor I was expecting but it certainly wasn’t this! “I know I’ve thrown this at you, I’ve had all afternoon to think about it. I almost called you right away but I wanted to talk to you in person. If you don’t want to it’s OK. Oh, and they’re arriving this Saturday.”

At first I was dismayed and my brain spun with a thousand thoughts: There’s no way we can do this. It’s challenging enough to have my in-laws around all day Friday when I’m working with the daycare, I can’t handle someone hanging around all day every day for two weeks. What if we can’t understand them? What if they can’t understand us? What will we feed them? Do Thai people eat dairy? What if they don’t like our food? The van is full with just us, how will we get anywhere all together? How are we going to get College Boy’s room and the rest of the house all cleaned up in time?

“What would they do all day?” I asked. “It’s the English teacher, and he’d go to school with me.” Teacher replied. That’s not so bad then, I can handle that. And Teacher wants to do it, he always finds ways for me to do the things I want to do. How can I say no? Besides, it would be great for the kids, and someday we want to go overseas – what if we were the ones without a host family? “OK, we’ll do it.” I told him – hopefully more confidently than I felt. “But we should probably talk to the kids first because it’s going to affect them too.” As Teacher continued to work on dinner I started to plan a cleaning schedule and tried not to worry.

During dinner Teacher told the kids about the opportunity. “That sounds cool!” Princess said, “Do you think he’ll teach us some Thai words?” Angel Face and Jo-Bear agreed that it sounded like fun. “Is it for sure?” Angel Face asked. Teacher turned to me with the question in his eyes and I said “Yes, it’s for sure.” He mouthed Thank you to me as I warned the kids that we’d have to do some major cleaning. “Tomorrow we’ll clean the stairs, upstairs bathroom and hall; Thursday we’ll clean the entire basement, steps to playroom; and Friday we’ll hit College Boy’s room.” Unbelievably they all agreed without much complaining!

The next day I shared the news with my friend Nicole. Nicole’s mom has hosted exchange students for years so I asked her about how to feed our guest. “You just make whatever you’d normally make and he’ll eat what he wants.” she said. “He’ll be here to experience our culture so that’s what he’ll be expecting.” After hearing that and after thinking about things all day I was feeling pretty good about the whole situation. Since our guest was an English teacher I assumed he’d have a fairly good command of the language. I wasn’t looking forward to cleaning, but with the kids’ help it would go faster, and I’d already worked out a plan to help things go smoothly. I was still a little worried that Teacher and I would lose our “together time”, but I trusted that we’d be able to carve out some time alone together.

Sunday we took Princess to the pet store to get a new hamster. I figured she’d avoid Teddy Bear and Panda varieties since they’d remind her of Marshmallow and Oreo, and was prepared to scout out where those hamsters were and steer her away from those cages. Luckily there were no Teddy Bear or Panda hamsters, but there were other adorable varieties. All of the hamsters were sleeping in their “castles” so it was hard to see them. We found an Associate and asked her to uncover them so Princess could get a good look at each of them. Princess’s eyes shone as hamster after adorable hamster was uncovered. “They’re all so CUTE!” she squealed. “Which one do you like?” I asked. I wanted to give her enough time to choose, but we were there with all the kids and Little Guy had decided he wanted DOWN NOW which meant that holding him was a Herculean effort.

“I like those…” she said, pointing to the cream and white dwarf hamsters. I was surprised to say the least, but glad she hadn’t chosen the Albino ones that freaked me out, looking like rats with their bright pink eyes. Dwarf hamsters are teeny tiny – less than half the size of the other hamsters we’ve had – and when the Associate lifted up their cave and they all wiggled around and started running in all directions, reminding me of mice. I didn’t like them at first, but the more I looked at them the more they grew on me. They had fluffy tan/grey backs with white tummies, long whiskers and bright black eyes. I read the sign posted above their cage and pointed out that they would only be about 2″ long when full-grown, and their life expectancy was only 1 year – half that of the bigger hamsters. Princess decided that was OK and started deciding which one she wanted.

The Associate told us that dwarf hamsters really should have a buddy or two so we ended up getting two hamsters. Princess pointed out the two she liked and we all laughed as the Associate tried to catch them. Not only are dwarf hamsters twice as small as other hamsters, they’re twice as fast! She caught the first one (later named Creampuff) fairly easily but the second one (Honeybun) evaded her for a good long time. Finally she got a small bowl, shooed Honeybun into it and covered it with her hand to transfer him into the cardboard carrier. Of course new hamsters need new stuff so we also bought treats, a cardboard tube filled with fluff (stuff that looks like pulled-apart cotton balls), extra fluff, a couple of add-on features for the cage, etc, etc, etc.

After getting the hamsters situated in their freshly-cleaned cage with it’s new tunnels, accessories, silent wheel and fluff tube we realized that they’d given us hints into their personalities as the Associate tried to catch them in the pet store. Both started out hiding in the side tubes, but after a while Creampuff slowly ventured out and since then Creampuff has always been the first to come out, and the one who’s been out more often. Honeybun is much more shy and prefers to hide when we’re around. If he does come out it’s only after Creampuff has been out for a while, and he’s likely to scurry back into the fluff tube or the side tubes at any moment.

Not only can we tell them apart by temperament, they look a little different too. Creampuff is a bit fluffier and lighter while Honeybun has slightly darker fur on his back and is a little thinner. They’re both almost impossible to catch and hold because they’re so small and fast, but I’m hoping that as they grow up they’ll mellow and get used to being held. They’re awfully hard to take photos of too! Creampuff is pictured in the cage, and Honeybun is being held by Princess.

Princess cuddled Oreo all the way to the vet, stroking his head and alternating between telling him how much she loved him and worrying that she’d been a bad hamster mommy. I reassured her that she had taken good care of him but that sometimes things happen anyway and it’s no one’s fault.

The vet’s office was quiet, as you’d expect at 10:30 on a Friday night. There was a maintenance worker mopping the floor I refrained from asking her if she wanted to do my floor when she was done. and a receptionist behind the counter who called a triage nurse to look at Oreo as we approached. The triage nurse arrived promptly, dressed in salmon-colored scrubs. She gently peeked under the corner of the washcloth Princess had put over Oreo’s head to keep him warm from the car to the building. “Poor little guy” the nurse said. Oreo’s mouth was wide open and his eyes were shut tightly. “He doesn’t look good.” I felt stupid stating the obvious, but didn’t know what else to say. “No, he doesn’t, does he?” the nurse answered, looking up at us with kind eyes. “He may already be gone, I don’t know. I’ll take him back to Doctor, but he may be gone.”

The receptionist guided us to an exam room where we waited, chatting about something I don’t recall now. We weren’t there long when the door opened slowly and quietly. A young vet with dark curly hair and purple scrubs came in. I was surprised to see her at first because our regular hamster vet is an older man who wears a white coat over his dress pants and button-down shirt. “I’m sorry, but he was gone by the time he got here.” she told us. I put my arm around Princess and held her tightly as we listened. The vet said there was really no way to know why he died, he could have choked on or aspirated some of his food, or gotten sick, but that small animals like hamsters go very quickly because they are so tiny. Because he was already gone when we arrived she didn’t charge us a fee, something I thought was very compassionate. The vet asked if we wanted to take Oreo home with us and Princess nodded her head vigorously. I was concerned that the ground would be too frozen yet to bury Oreo, but understood how important it was for Princess to bury him by Marshmallow.

The doctor brought us Oreo’s body. His washcloth had been wrapped neatly around his body and taped shut, with an “H” over his head. She told Princess how sorry she was as Princess took Oreo. I thanked the doctor and put my arm around Princess as we walked out to the car.

When we got home there was the problem of what to do with his body until we could bury it. Angel Face, Princess and I had band the next morning and wouldn’t be home until noon. Not only would it be gross to just leave it out, we were afraid of what the cats might do. Princess didn’t want his body in the cage in her room, I didn’t want it in the freezer, so Teacher finally said “Why not put him outside?” Princess was worried a raccoon, neighborhood cat or other nocturnal visitor would get at him so I got a Glad Ware container to put him. Princess lowered Oreo’s body slowly into the container then stood looking at it, holding the lid in both of her hands.

She started to move the lid toward the container, then stopped. “I don’t want him to be dead!” she wailed. “I know, but he is and we can’t change that” I answered. “But I don’t want him to be dead.” she repeated firmly, looking at me with huge dark eyes. “I know baby, I know” I answered. She started to put the lid on the container several more times and after what seemed like forever she finally fit the lid on and closed it, crying. I held her and went with her to put the container in the corner of the back porch, then put a sled in front of it to hopefully dissuade any night visitors from investigating too closely. Princess went upstairs to call Country Boy, her boyfriend, and tell him the sad news.

The next morning on the way to band I asked Princess if she wanted to get another hamster. She didn’t know. She still felt badly for not playing with Oreo as much as she thought she should have and wasn’t sure she wanted to fall in love with another hamster and have him die on her too. She decided to think about it for a while.

After we got home from band the first thing we did was bury Oreo. Princess chose another bright flannel from my stash – Rubber Ducks – because she wanted something cheerful to wrap around him. Our feet squished in the lawn as we walked to the far corner of the yard and I felt relief that the ground was soft enough to dig in. Thank heavens he hadn’t died over the winter! There was still quite a bit of snow in that shady corner but Teacher had gone out ahead of us and had a hole ready. The bottom of the hole filled with water from the melting snow as we waited for Princess to lower Oreo. “I don’t want to put him in the water” she said. When we had buried Marshmallow we lined the grave with flowers but there were no flowers blooming yet. I looked around the yard, searching for anything that would work and spied a sprig of evergreen on the ground. “How about if we put that in the bottom?” I asked, pointing at the twig. Princess liked that idea, and as Teacher scooped the water out and retrieved the greenery I found some dried flowers that had survived the winter to put on top of the evergreen. When the grave was ready I prompted Princess to say her final goodbye. “Sorry honey, but you should probably hurry before it gets watery again.” She looked at Oreo’s body and gave the head a gentle caress, then slowly lowered it into the hole and stepped backward. After Teacher filled the hole she put a large stone on top of the grave and we walked back to the house, our arms around each other’s waists and Teacher following with the shovel. “Mommy? I think I do want another hamster.”

We had a tragedy over the weekend – poor little Oreo died suddenly Friday night. We had “adopted” Oreo for Princess after her much-loved Marshmallow died of old age, and have only had him for about six months. Princess had looked forward to Oreo living as long as Marshmallow had so he could be her “baby” until she went off to college in about a year and a half.

We’re not sure what happened to Oreo. Thursday night he was bright-eyed and active when I put his wheel back up in his cage and started running on it immediately. I thought that was really cool because I’d been trying to catch him running on it for months but he’d hear me creeping up on him and get off the wheel before I came close enough to see.

Friday morning it was dark and I was tired when I woke the girls up for school. Sometimes I peek in the cage while I’m waiting for them to mutter that they’re awake, but that morning I was too tired. Now of course I wish I had checked on him – if I’d realized he was sick I could have taken him to the vet.

That night I did peek at Oreo when I went in to say goodnight to Angel Face. He was curled into a little fluffball all cuddled into his bedding, sound asleep. I tapped on the lid above him and said “Hi Oreo” as I usually do at bedtime. At first when he didn’t move I thought “Wow, he’s really sound asleep” and tapped again. When he didn’t move the second time I became worried and opened the lid to gently nudge him with the tip of my finger. His body was still soft so I knew he wasn’t dead, but he still didn’t move. By this time both Princess and Angel Face were watching me with panicked looks in their big brown eyes. I said “Princess…” as I moved closer to Oreo, looking for signs of breathing. “He’s not dead!” she said emphatically from across the room. Angel Face crawled across her bed to peer at Oreo. “Is he breathing?”

Just then I saw a slight movement of the white fur on his sides. “He’s still breathing, but he doesn’t look good.” I said. “He’s not sick, he can’t be!” Princess flew across the room and gingerly touched Oreo’s back. “He’s really cold” she said. I sent Angel Face for a washcloth and wrapped Oreo in it. He stayed cuddled in a small ball, his front paws near his face. Princess cuddled him against her chest and covered him with her hands.

Jo-Bear and Z-man had heard us talking and came into the room, crowding around Princess and Oreo. “What’s the matter?” Jo-Bear asked. “Oreo’s sick” I answered. “Awww…” Z-Man looked sad as he gently touched Oreo’s head. After a few minutes I shooed them back to bed and took Little Guy downstairs to get ready for bed.

After Little Guy was nursed to sleep, a fact made obvious by his loud snoring, I took him upstairs to his crib and checked on Oreo and Princess on the way back down. Oreo looked a little more lively – his eyes were open and bright and I started thinking maybe he’d be OK after all. Princess had been researching hamsters on the internet and thought maybe he’d caught a cold. According to the site a lethargic hamster should go to the vet, but it was 10pm on a Friday night – not a time I really wanted to visit the vet. Teacher and I were discussing whether I should take Oreo and Princess to the vet right away or if he should take them in the morning when Princess came down the stairs. “Mommy,” she said with fear in her voice, “he’s making a weird noise.” When I saw his eyes shut and his mouth open I knew we had to make the trip to the vet right away.

To be continued…